10 Years a Mother

So... this amazing girl just hit double digits.

There was a time, when I was pregnant with her, that I really had to work through my feelings about becoming a mother at all (I've linked some blog posts here). I had never been all that keen on motherhood - from my own growing up experiences, I saw children as nothing but needy and motherhood as a trap.

How different it all has shaped up to be... I guess like the baby inside me during pregnancy being unable to imagine life outside, nothing I imagined was anywhere close to the reality. Because what I was surprised by wasn't the drudgery of changing nappies and constant feeding - which turned out not to be drudgery at all - but the joy and love this little being filled me with. I felt like I was coming into my own, I never felt lost or 'not enough' as I heard other new mothers lament at times... against all expectations, I felt perfectly equipped and was loving every minute. Tired as I was, I loved it and I embraced it all.

From this tiny newborn, she grew into a curious toddler, who was never anything but kind to the little brother who invaded her world when she was only 19 months old (although at first she was really quite cross with me!) - even from this tiny age, she's loved babies and she still does.

So where are we now, at age 10?

There's so many aspects to her personality, I can't even begin to do her justice. She has always been a people person, and remains that - everyone's a friend, there are no strangers in her world. Her friends range in age from zero to a hundred: it really struck me during the hard of hearing conference in Norway, how easily she related to a hard of hearing elderly conference attendee one moment and a little four-year-old Ukrainian girl the next.

Receiving a birthday gift from our Norwegian friend

She's also a footballer, loves to play at the local club. That she's the only girl doesn't seem to bother her at all; and the other players have started calling her 'the medic' because whenever anyone falls over or looks hurt, she's the first person there to check on them.

Birthday Cake

She's always been people focused, rather than 'stuff' focused; and so buying her presents has never been easy. This year, again, I spent a good amount of money on her party at a trampoline park with friends, because that was her main gift - other than that, the only thing she really asked for was a dog onesie! And the party was a huge success for all.

She's been empathetic from the get-go, and remains that way. When D(8) flies into a temper and shouts at me, she's always there to hug and comfort me. I reassure her I don't take it personally, as D is just angry, but her concern is for my feelings... what a beautiful heart she has. She sees the good in everyone, believes in and cheers others on (in football, she's usually the only kid who's totally unbothered by losing - it's the game that counts!) and looks after the small and weak in a group.

I don't know how I've ended up with a child like this, whose middle name - Joy - so defines her character and what it's like to know her. I can't take credit for any of it. But I love walking with her; and so we enter a new decade, new challenges and experiences, and I can't wait to see where she will go. I'll be right alongside her.